We’ve been pondering for some time about those life-altering, earth-shattering events identifiable in short as “blindsides”. Think death of a loved one, relationship breakdown or betrayal or diagnosis of a complex medical condition. These events are so out of the ordinary and often perceived as so consequential to our ongoing existence, that they can make us question our fundamental beliefs about the universe and our place within it.
Blindsides are quite literally, challenges that we didn’t see coming and they can be completely destabilising to our sense of self and our perceived ability to exercise autonomy or “control” over our life circumstances.
So, if you ever find your world spinning because of a blind side, we hope that these 5 universal truths help move you towards feeling re-grounded and re-centred after a major life event.
Truth 1: A blind side can happen to anyone
It is a simple fact that blindsides happen to almost everyone at some point in their life. You have not been singled out by the universe and designated “unlucky”. This is just your moment and you have the inner strength to withstand and come through it.
Truth 2: There’s a reason why they have the impact they do
What is a blind side to one person may be considered par for the course for another. Blindsides are inherently personal because they often arise from a mismatch between our internal schema (being our perception of how we view ourselves as an operator in the natural world) and our current experience of reality.
The fact that an event is even identified as a potential blindside means that it has likely hit you in a sweet spot of vulnerability. The feeling of being blindsided often comes from a place of caring deeply about certain things (whether that be your health, meaningful relationships, pursuing success or achievement etc.). Knowing this brings into focus those things that are truly precious to you in life. Take notice of what they are.
Truth 3: It’s most likely a bigger deal in your mind than it is in reality
Our emotions typically become heightened when our sense of self is destabilised. It is likely a biological process that, like many circadian rhythms, needs to be allowed to rise and subside. Knowing this allows you to be more accepting of how you may feel in certain moments, whilst also emboldening you to make a plan to take back control of how your inner world is responding to your external circumstances when the time is right.
Truth 4: Blindsides can be net positive
It may be quite difficult to imagine at times but blind sides can actually be net positive events. Some aspects will most likely remain negative (that is the nature of a blind side) but they can also lead you to a deeper lived experience, greater control over your mindset and deeper, more meaningful connections with the people with whom you share this world with. This process (or a variant of it) is often described as “post-traumatic growth”, which is explained in more detail in another article, Growth After Trauma.
Follow the path created by your blind side and you may be surprised where it leads you. These positive outcomes will most likely be at least once or twice removed from the blind side itself, so you will probably need to examine your situation with an open and gracious outlook to make these connections.
Truth 5: You can choose to embrace a mindset of strength and self-determination
We’ve discussed some thoughts and ideas to help promote a positive internal response to a blind side or major life event. Now, here are a few practical steps you can take to start to cultivate a mindset of strength and self-determination.
- Read, listen and learn from the life stories of others who have not only experienced but thrived following a major life event, such as Dylan Alcott’s book, Able and Mandy Hose and Kate Jones’s podcast about parenting children with additional needs, Too Peas in a Podcast.
- Connect with people experiencing similar life circumstances through platforms like Inspire.
- Use wearable symbolism, such as our premium crystal jewellery, to amplify sources of light and positivity during challenging times.
Lesley Naik
Lesley is an intellectual property lawyer, Mum of 3 (including twins) and Founder of the Australian natural crystal jewellery brand, Earthlight. Earthlight creates jewellery for life’s pivotal moments. The business specialises in fertility and pregnancy bracelets, positive mindset necklaces and jewellery for Mums and is the exclusive owner of Superpower® jewellery in Australia and the UK.
